【优卡丹】
1、爸妈是孩子1生中最重要的不可代替的教导者
0~6岁是孩子品质及良好习惯形成的关键时期。儿童生命的最初两年，是与爸妈建立牢固情感纽带的关键期，是儿童未来心理成长并与她人建立信任和爱的关系的基础。
所有关于生命知识的50%，是在生命的第1年学习的，生命的第2年，学习25%，这里的生命知识主要是指爱的能力和情感的发展。
2、假如想要改变孩子的行为，爸妈应先改变自己
教导孩子就是教导自己的1个过程，孩子的不良行为，往往是从环境或爸妈那儿直接传授下来的。树立榜样来教导是发展孩子道德行为的最可靠的办法。
3、培养儿童的灵性品质其重要性远远超过智力开拓
灵是树，心智是果；灵是灯，心智是光。人的智力是灵性品质的反射。假如只注重技能的培养<如各种5花8门的早期智力开拓兴趣班>，而忽视儿童的精神品质的培养，只能是本末倒置，孩子长大成人后，她们的人格就会有缺陷，道德发展受到阻碍。
四：合理的管束
管束孩子是告诉她们行为的标准，即神马样的事情可以去做，神马样的事情不能做。管束要有权威：当孩子可能要犯错误，大家不得不进行管束的时候，1定要有权威性。让孩子晓得您是严肃的，而且您们提的要求是将伴随惩罚或奖赏的。合利地限制孩子可以培养孩子的纪律观念，当然，对孩子的管束必须是负责任的。而且要告诉孩子您提出要求的原因。和孩子的爸爸保持1致性：爸妈在管束孩子时保持1致，这样孩子可以建立统1的行为标准。即使对爸爸的管束有异议，也最好在以后孩子不在场时，再与她进行讨论。这样做，也可以树立起爸妈双方的权威性。不要惩罚得太多：不可从生理和心理上孩子，要把孩子管好，上策就是对她好的表现进行奖励。
5：用积极鼓励的办法，使孩子建立良好的自我价值观
爸妈需要主动地将大部分的价值观和行为方式教给孩子。以便于孩子在社会上成长。当然，在这方面，身教胜于言传，大家可以做孩子的好榜样。创建良好的家庭氛围是非常重要的。因此，大家不可以让孩子去做大家不愿意的事，也不可以自己做1套，让孩子去做另1套。只有大家以身作则，注重孩子价值观与礼貌的培养，才能教导出品德高尚的下1代。
高自我价值观的人具有3个"能力"：我有能力；我能与周边的人交往；我能随时随地为她人的幸福作出贡献。相信自己有学习和成长的潜能，发展出勇气、信仰、自信、信赖生活和她人等等品质。反之，低自我价值观是1种对自我的消极认识，自责、羞辱、愤怒、憎恨等毁灭觉始终伴随1生。
六：接纳、确认孩子的各种情绪<尤其是消极的>
当爸妈否认孩子的感觉时，孩子认为她得不到理解。只有当孩子的情绪被接纳，她的感觉舒畅了，她的行为才会良好，因为孩子是生活在感觉的世界里。
倾听孩子的心声有经验的爸妈提出，通过说话来了解她们的感受，是非常有价值的1种方式。不论孩子提出的问题是大还是小，都要尽可能找时间立刻去倾听她所说的话，而不要让孩子等您有了空闲时间再说。与孩子说话，为大家提供了1次了解和教导孩子的机会。立刻倾听孩子的谈话，有助于赢得孩子的信任，这样孩子才愿意把所有的事都告诉大家。而对大家来讲，了解孩子头脑里想的是神马，也是1件非常重要的事情。因此，当孩子与大家谈话时，大家要尽可能地立刻与她交谈。这样孩子就不会失望了，她可以感受到她对大家是多么的重要，她也就会更多地把心里话告诉大家。
六：设立明确家规，定期召开家庭会议
孩子需要晓得界限在哪里，哪些是该做的，哪些是不该做的，没有规则孩子反而没有安全感。家规不超过5条到6条，应适合于家里的特定需要，而且必须用肯定句来陈述，将家规贴出来。假如违反家规应明确相应的处罚措施。1旦建立，就应坚决执行，每隔1段时间，应对家规作调整和修补。定期召开家庭会议，使全家1起分享生命发展的过程，发展民主，相互尊重，享受爱的氛围。
七：在1定范围内给孩子抉择权
随着孩子的成长，给她越来越多的自由和控制自己生活的权力是非常重要的。必须有意识地要求自己；甚至是克制自己的那种神马事都为孩子做的想法，来给孩子1些自由度。给孩子1定的自由，表明大家信任和尊重孩子，孩子也会因此更加尊重大家，爱大家。
在1定范围内给孩子抉择权，通过提供抉择，可以避免紧张气氛，给孩子提供做决定的实践机会。如"睡觉时间到了，您是要听昨天的故事呢，还是想听1个新的故事？""您今日是想穿粉红色的上衣，还是蓝色的T恤？<如孩子两者都不选，爸妈可问："是我帮您选，还是您自己选？">做抉择并让孩子负责任都是日常的行为，对于发展孩子的自我价值观是至关重要的。
8：游戏是儿童的主要活动，儿童通过游戏学习
儿童通过接触具体的、的与生活有关的东西学习，需要与同伴、成人和环境互动交流，游戏使儿童放松且发展专注的工作态度。在5岁之前不应过早开始对字母数字等符号的专门练习，这样会限制孩子的思维，因为的心智还没成熟，对抽像的概念还没有办法理解。
九：正面告诉孩子应当做神马，而不是不该做神马
传统型教导者的居高临下的姿态，总是对孩子说"不准打人，不准在沙发上吃东西"等等，这种的口气只会将注意力引向并集中于的行为；而孩子仍然不晓得好的行为是神马，自己应当做神马。积极的说法是用美德修正孩子的行为，如"您忘记了与人和平相处"或"大家是在餐桌上吃东西的！"
十：每天抽时间跟孩子单独相处，1起做点双方都感兴趣的事情
每个孩子都需要从爸妈那里得到足够的重视。在每天工作之余，大家要腾出1些时间参加孩子的游戏。要为孩子提供各种各样的经历，尽可能让孩子接触到各类东西。爸妈作为孩子的倾听者、支持者、精神的陪伴者，当孩子遇到挫折时，应尊重孩子的感受，以超脱且同情的态度陪伴在孩子的身边。
十1：不要忘了给自己留下1点休息时间
大家应当主动地找寻1点时间，暂把孩子放在1边。这是为孩子创造更好的心理环境。抚养孩子并不意味着大家要放弃大家个人的需要和夫妻间的交流，夫妻关系的和谐对家庭稳定至关重要。另外，大家需重心空闲时间做自己喜欢的事情，远离繁琐的家务和工作。要有1点幽默感，不要为自己的1点点错误懊悔不已。调整1下自己的心情，放松1下紧张的神经，善于休息，才能更善于工作。
十2：让孩子的爸爸发挥作用
心理学家研究表明，爸爸对孩子的成长非常重要，爸爸不但是1个监督者，更需要成为积极的参与者。爸妈作为1个集体，讨论教导的原则，与孩子1起游戏，1起谈话，这样会收到更好的效果。让周边的人帮助您，使您自己的生活轻松。
十3：享受孩子带来的快乐
成功的爸妈们深刻的感觉到伴随孩子成长带来的快乐。由于孩子使大家的生活变得伟大，使大家变得更有理解力，使大家生活有了期待。因此，大家不要去抱怨自己的辛苦，而要用心去发现和享受孩子带来的快乐！
1, parents are 1 children in the most important students can not be replaced by instructors
0~6 years is a critical period in which children develop good habits and good habits. The first two years of a child's life is a critical period for building strong emotional bonds with parents, the foundation for a child's future mental growth and a relationship of trust and love with her people.
All 50% of life knowledge is learned in the first years of life, the second years of life, learning 25%, here the life knowledge mainly refers to the ability to love and emotional development.
2, if you want to change the behavior of the child, parents should change themselves first
Teaching a child is the 1 process of teaching yourself. The child's bad behavior is often taught directly from the environment or to his parents. Setting an example and teaching is the surest way to develop a child's moral behavior.
3, the importance of training children's spiritual qualities is far more important than intellectual development
A spirit is a tree, a mind is a fruit, a spirit is a lamp, and a mind is light. Human intelligence is the reflection of spiritual qualities. If only pay attention to the cultivation of "skills such as 5 flowers open class > 8 door early intelligence, but neglects to cultivate children's spiritual quality, only have the order reversed, the children grow up, they will be defective personality, moral development is hindered.
Four: reasonable control
Control the children is to tell their behavior standards, that god horse kind of things can do, god horse kind of things can't do. Bundles have the authority: when the child may make mistakes, when we had to bundle, 1 must have authority. Let the child know that you are serious, and that your request is accompanied by punishment or reward. The restraint of the child can foster the discipline of the child and, of course, the responsibility of the child. Also, tell the child why you asked for it. 1 times as much as the father of a child: parents keep 1 times when they control their children, so that children can establish a 1 standard of behavior. Even if you have objections to your father's control, it is better to discuss with her later on when the child is absent. In doing so, the authority of both parents can be established. Don't punish too much: you can't physically and psychologically abuse your child. The best way to manage your child is to reward her performance.
5: to encourage children to build up a good sense of self-worth
Parents need to actively teach most of their values and behaviors to their children. So that children can grow up in society. Of course, in this regard, example is better than precept, we can make a good example for kids. It's important to create a good home atmosphere. Therefore, we can not let the children do what we do not want, nor can do 1 sets of their own, let the children do 1 other sets. Only when we set an example and pay attention to the cultivation of children's values and manners can we teach the next 1 generations of noble character.
A person with high self values has 3 abilities: I have ability; I can relate to people around me; I can contribute to her happiness whenever and wherever possible. Believe in your potential to learn and grow, develop courage, belief, confidence, trust in life, and the qualities of others. On the contrary, low self values are 1 negative perceptions of self, and destructive feelings such as self reproach, humiliation, anger, hatred and so on are always accompanied by 1 lives.
Six: accept and confirm the child's various emotions < < negative > >
When parents deny the child's feelings, the child thinks she doesn't understand. Only when the child's feelings are accepted, she feels comfortable, her behavior will be good, because the child is living in a sense of the world.
Listening to the voice of a child, experienced parents, and talking about how they feel, are very valuable in 1 ways. No matter whether the child's question is big or small, try to listen as soon as possible, and don't let the child wait until you have free time. Talking to children gives you 1 opportunities to understand and teach your child. Listening to a child's conversation immediately helps to win the confidence of a child so that the child is willing to tell you everything. And for everyone, to understand the child's mind is god horse, is also 1 very important thing. So when a child talks to everyone, talk to her as soon as possible. This way, the child will not be disappointed, she can feel how important she is to everyone, and she will tell you more about it.
Six: the establishment of clear rules, regularly held a family meeting
Children need to know where boundaries are, what should be done and what should not be done. Without rules, children are insecure. The rules do not exceed 5 to 6, should be tailored to the specific needs of home, and must use affirmative statement, posted rules. If you violate the rules should be clear corresponding punishment measures. 1 once established, it must be firmly carried out, every 1 time, to adjust and repair rules. A family meeting is held regularly to share 1 lives, develop democracy, respect for each other and enjoy the atmosphere of love.
Seven: within the scope of 1 to give the child the right to choose
As the child grows, it is important to give her more freedom and control over her life. You have to consciously ask yourself, or even control your own ideas about what God does for your child. Give the child 1 degrees of freedom. Give children 1 freedom, show that you trust and respect children, the children will therefore more respect for everyone, love everyone.
Within 1 limits, the child's right to choose, by providing choice, can avoid tension, to the child